Goldilocks and the 3 bachelors

Like most people, when a new year rolls around- I strive to make changes in a positive manner. I am not immune to resolutions. So this year, one of my general resolutions is to take matters into my own hands. This is mainly in regards to my love life. Because it hasn't been happening so I'm trying to make some things happen. And what's the best way to get a date? By having another date. A lot of this falls in line with things that I have said in the past, seeing all my friends getting married and having babies, buying houses and progressing in their careers. I know I am moving forward in my own way, but there is one part of my life that makes me incomplete in a way that overshadows the rest. As much as I like to think of this as societal pressure, it is not. I think I do a pretty good job of warding off external forces. Even from my mom who wants grandchildren so badly she has already bought clothes for them and my dad who has told me to freeze my eggs, I'm blocking it out and moving on....but I feel it. I blame it on biology, which is unavoidable. I think I can pinpoint the moment when I am ovulating. I feel like a cave woman who only wants to eat meat and procreate. It is real.

Whoa, that was kind of sappy- let's get down to the nitty gritty. I joined an online dating website and I despise it. I feel like I'm prancing myself out there like a show dog. I send messages to men I find intriguing and attractive, but rarely get a response back. Those that have contacted me thus far, I am not interested in. I am trying to have an open mind and be non-judgemental. But it feels unnatural, forced and just not me. I am a friggin' hippy at heart, I didn't have a cell phone until I was 24, I don't have cable, keep my money under my mattress and didn't shave my armpits for a good couple years. This process is just so inorganic, man.

This brings me to the night of the 3 bachelors, 2 meetings were planned and one was not. 

• Bachelor #1 (Age: mid 30's): Avid traveler, musician with a degree in International Business- well dressed and cute. He talked about himself the entire time, later on I found out he has been out of work for 6 months. I let the uncomfortable silences linger because I wanted to see what would happen. And he filled them up with showing me photos on his phone of his recent trips to somewhere. Also, he wanted to go dancing but he had some sort of limp. I am going to hell, I know. He thought he was too cool for school, so I'll label him as "Too Hot...."
• Bachelor #2 (Age: late 30's): Manager at a popular, busy local restaurant. Owns apartment in Cambridge. Good on paper. In person, within 30 seconds of meeting him- he immediately brought to our attention that he knows he is short. He had small hands. He also said: "Yeah, I have tickets to the Patriots game tomorrow, yeah like 15 rows up from the 50-yard line, I know- horrible seats, they really suck." Ew dude, just ew. He then proceeded to also talk about himself for the 5 minutes we interacted (he was on the clock or something, I really didn't care). He had a Napoleon Complex and was just not a nice person, so he is "Too Cold..."
• Bachelor #3 (Age: 22): Finishing up college, getting his nursing degree (triple bonus points right there!), cute as a button, scratch that- he was a serious hottie. Sweet and gentlemanly. Didn't speak solely about himself, laughed easily, was not pretentious. Good kisser (see where this is going....), thought I was 26 years old. There is a negative to hooking up with a guy who is in town visiting his friend from college- shocking, I know. It involves a closet (at least it was a walk-in closet), a yoga mat, a hockey skate slicing up my leg and finally, grabbing my clothes in the morning, changing in the bathroom and doing "the smash and dash". But following the first two bachelor's of the evening- I needed a lil' somethin' somethin', I will label him as "Just Right...." 

I'm learning that first impressions mean a lot, this dating game requires a lot of time and energy, you need to have thick skin and let things roll off your back. And I also believe that sometimes it is okay to get an ego boost from Mr. Right Now. I am still looking for Mr. Right, but like Goldilocks- I am passing on Mr. Too Hot and Mr. Too Cold- cause ain't nobody got time for that!